So yea today have been challenging for me, cause i pretty much went through an emotional breakdown in the evening and it wasnt pretty and it wasnt in any shape or form nice to myself the way this was handled..
So yea today was weird from start until end in a sence where i just had this little voice in the back of my head keep poking for attention but i didnt give it any until the evening came and i kinda fucked up badly..
Cause the thing with me, is i suffer from low selfasteem and i dont really trust my own head that is attached to my shoulders and today just hit me very very hard.
So yea i broke down in the evening, with everything that have been going on in my head that day it just took over completely and i am not gonna lie i felt like i had one of my really bad depressive episodes wich i normally now can handle cause i got help with how to handle them. But today just was different so i sat in my bed in the evening and just felt like all those emotions that was inside just bubbled up to the surface and i just cried and couldnt even speak cause it was so much emotions all at once.
Knowing myself this will be a hard day for me tomorrow aswell cause i need time to reset my head properly and process what happend and what i should be focusing on but that was not the case today. I have not felt the need to reset my head until today so Saturday will be spent trying to fix my head and get into that good headspace again.