I keep thinking everything is ok, i keep distracting myself and say everything is ok. But deep down i know in my body, in my mind that it isnt true.
Frozen in a place, nowhere to feel safe in my head the corner hides nothing but thoughts.
So what if i keep walking the same road again. The same town, the same houses all stay still. The only thing moving is me and that cant be forgotten.
Besten, mentally not physically. Scares of what tomorrow holds. Afraid of what tomorrow will bring. The sun might shine and i might feel the warmth, but deep down i still feel frozen.
There lies something i remember, a laugh, a cry, a harmless tear. But even tho i try go closer the further away it gets that little piece of something i had but now forgotten.
Its not as drowning cause all tears create a airpocket to keep me afloat. Deep down in my mind all the doors have been opened all the doors that should stayed closed have all been opened.
To finish of this long text of words i leave a small poem i wrote over 12 years ago:
“I am a leaf, blowing in the wind. Never to be found and never to be forgotten.”